We were in the same class in kindergarden. We were also in the same class in elementary school. I was invited to her birthday party every year. We hanged out together during recess. And we discussed homework over the phone for the whole night. I was so glad to have this friend.
Then we went to the same highschool. We were in the same class in the first year, so as the second year. Then one day during the second year, another friend said she wanted to hang out with us. So we hang out. She didn't really talk to me when we were together. She only talked to my friend, completely ignored me. Then gradually, somehow they were always alone. She always needed some help from my friend, while I was busy with volleyball. And so, our contact was less than the day before, day by day. In the third year, we were in different classes which led to decrease chance of interaction. Then we didn't celebrate our birthdays anymore. We didn't talk to each other anymore.
Now that we grow up, we don't have each other's contact anymore. I hate that girl.
And it's like history repeats itself.
There is great chance that I am not able to find someone to share our lives together. Friends will be my only spiritual support to face the shits happened in life. If this component is lost as well, I really have nothing. Life is not possible to go on. It's not possible......
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Eat Pork
Eat Pork
Definition: (verb) taking up his/her cases when the staff is on holiday.
There were two PT I taking on holidays for the next two weeks. Therefore, I need to eat pork for the upcoming two weeks. I have three pieces of pork to eat.
Other staff may think that it is causing a heavy burden for me because I am still adapting to the normal case load. However, I think of as a positive scenerio. The "God of PNF" reserved these three pieces of pork for me. He must have thought that I am competent enough to increase my caseload for a bit, and those "porks" are easy enough for me to handle. I should thank him for trusting my ability.
For the clinical placements in the past three years, I usually enjoyed my placements in inpatient settings. There was enormous stress but I was also worried that the last day might come too soon.
A week has passed. I thought it was really really tough work and I couldn't wait to get out of this place. On Friday, after I finished all the documentation, I had the same feeling of worrying the last day may come too soon. I was hesitated to leave. I did not want to leave. It was a friday.
This is the sign of turning into a workaholic.
Definition: (verb) taking up his/her cases when the staff is on holiday.
There were two PT I taking on holidays for the next two weeks. Therefore, I need to eat pork for the upcoming two weeks. I have three pieces of pork to eat.
Other staff may think that it is causing a heavy burden for me because I am still adapting to the normal case load. However, I think of as a positive scenerio. The "God of PNF" reserved these three pieces of pork for me. He must have thought that I am competent enough to increase my caseload for a bit, and those "porks" are easy enough for me to handle. I should thank him for trusting my ability.
For the clinical placements in the past three years, I usually enjoyed my placements in inpatient settings. There was enormous stress but I was also worried that the last day might come too soon.
A week has passed. I thought it was really really tough work and I couldn't wait to get out of this place. On Friday, after I finished all the documentation, I had the same feeling of worrying the last day may come too soon. I was hesitated to leave. I did not want to leave. It was a friday.
This is the sign of turning into a workaholic.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Being a staff
The thing that I am worried the most, happened within 4 days after being a staff.
Last summer, people asked me if I want to work in Hong Kong. My answers were the same to everyone -- probably not, because of the workload. The workload in HA is too heavy that sooner or later I will become a robot just to finish the work without care.
The workload right now is considered as normal for a normal staff. However, what I observed right now is that, there is a lack of quality in the service that I am providing, there is overtime work, therefore, there is a lack of quality of life for myself. What a shame.
Honestly, I am quite disappointed in the work that I did within the past week. I just couldn't finish all of them. There is insufficient time to do detailed assessment, therefore, there is insufficient data in identifying the main issue. A couple of patients have multiple joint problems which occupied most of my time and I am screwed for the rest of the day.
Therefore, here's the plan. Start early, documentation during lunch time, overtime for only half an hour. I'd rather improve the quality of service as my priority. Just hopefully, my OT will gradually shorten, and hopefully, as soon as possible.
Last summer, people asked me if I want to work in Hong Kong. My answers were the same to everyone -- probably not, because of the workload. The workload in HA is too heavy that sooner or later I will become a robot just to finish the work without care.
The workload right now is considered as normal for a normal staff. However, what I observed right now is that, there is a lack of quality in the service that I am providing, there is overtime work, therefore, there is a lack of quality of life for myself. What a shame.
Honestly, I am quite disappointed in the work that I did within the past week. I just couldn't finish all of them. There is insufficient time to do detailed assessment, therefore, there is insufficient data in identifying the main issue. A couple of patients have multiple joint problems which occupied most of my time and I am screwed for the rest of the day.
Therefore, here's the plan. Start early, documentation during lunch time, overtime for only half an hour. I'd rather improve the quality of service as my priority. Just hopefully, my OT will gradually shorten, and hopefully, as soon as possible.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Watch as a gift
There are reasons why I don't usually wear a watch. I actually don't wear watches.
Firstly, a watch is a weapon to hurt my patients. If I forget to remove it, it may be very inconvenient at work. Patients may get scratches from the accessories that I wear.
Secondly, wearing a watch makes a watch mark when getting a sun tan. My whole arm will be nicely tanned, except that watch mark. It could be the ugliest thing ever appear on earth.
You may tell me to remove the watch for the above two situations. However, thirdly, I don't wear watches because I know I will lose it. For all these years, it doesn't matter who gives me the watch, I lose it right away. It didn't take long... probably 2-3 months, it disappeared.
Trust me it will happen. But my dad probably observed that I don't have a watch, and he bought me a watch as a gift, for my graduation I believe. I am very very nervous right now. Honestly don't wanna lose it because it is a super beautiful watch which costs a hell lot of money. I am soooo scared of losing it.
What do I do?
Firstly, a watch is a weapon to hurt my patients. If I forget to remove it, it may be very inconvenient at work. Patients may get scratches from the accessories that I wear.
Secondly, wearing a watch makes a watch mark when getting a sun tan. My whole arm will be nicely tanned, except that watch mark. It could be the ugliest thing ever appear on earth.
You may tell me to remove the watch for the above two situations. However, thirdly, I don't wear watches because I know I will lose it. For all these years, it doesn't matter who gives me the watch, I lose it right away. It didn't take long... probably 2-3 months, it disappeared.
Trust me it will happen. But my dad probably observed that I don't have a watch, and he bought me a watch as a gift, for my graduation I believe. I am very very nervous right now. Honestly don't wanna lose it because it is a super beautiful watch which costs a hell lot of money. I am soooo scared of losing it.
What do I do?
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Real work
When vacations over, life brings you back to reality. I should consider that as lucky to have a new beginning.
So far, I have so great colleagues and a great P1. She gives me a lot of room of freedom that I can choose my own mode of working. The most important thing is "I have to finish them". Also, all colleagues emphasize on the fact that there's no right or wrong. Therefore, I need to believe in what I believe.
Honestly, when JP Lau talks in front of us, I can feel the current of wind blowing around the room. The power can be felt all over.
Next week, I will have to be totally independent. Wish me luck.
So far, I have so great colleagues and a great P1. She gives me a lot of room of freedom that I can choose my own mode of working. The most important thing is "I have to finish them". Also, all colleagues emphasize on the fact that there's no right or wrong. Therefore, I need to believe in what I believe.
Honestly, when JP Lau talks in front of us, I can feel the current of wind blowing around the room. The power can be felt all over.
Next week, I will have to be totally independent. Wish me luck.